My Thoughts on the Tsubasaism Autobiography + Other Thoughts

 I hope that you guys enjoyed the Tsubasaism autobiography! It was such an interesting thing to read and translate. I think Tsubasa Masuwaka is such a freaking icon. She truly did change the gyaru game when she was active in the scene. I was really shocked that someone of her status endured so much fucking hate and bullying pre and post-modeling. It really goes to show that you can equally have as many people who love you as much as you have people who really do hate you for whatever reason. 

I feel like Tsubasa in her younger years pre-modeling really did deal with an excessive amount of fake jealous people around her. Not true friends. True friends will always be excited and clap for you during your era of success. Always. Unfortunately, I feel like a lot of girls aren't aware of that in their younger years. Especially if you are introverted. When you are introverted, you really don't deal with too many people or a variety of people who understand what shitty behavior is until you actually meet people that you actually vibe that are "your people" as I call it. 

As shocking as it was to many to hear that a gyaru of all people, and one as impactful as Tsubasa was introverted..she did mention that she was conditioned to be that way due to the fact that she automatically assumes people hate her from the start. This is something I immediately related to. I have the same thoughts. I think Tsubasa and myself are actually quite extroverted people naturally, however shit experiences are pretty traumatizing and condition you to be way more withdrawn with people. 

I feel like it took Tsubasa a while to meet 'her people' because even during her modeling days, she kind of implied that she was pretty isolated as a reader model compared to the other gals and was occupied with working very hard. Once she became successful, a lot of people felt entitled to all aspects of her life including her marriage and pregnancy. Even the magazine didn't necessarily want her to keep those affairs quiet. The wedding photos are especially iconic to me and there was SO MUCH stuff capitalized off of during Tsubasa and Naoki's wedding era...LL collab items and everything. However, I wonder if Tsubasa was miserable doing those things given that I think deep down, she wanted to keep her marriage and the birth of Rion private. 

It's a weird thing to think about. That era is so iconic and memorable because there was so much hype around a famous Popteen and Men's Egg model marrying. Definetely idealistic power couple moves that unfortunately didn't last as Tsubasa got divorced in 2011/2012ish. At the same time, looking back on it and reading about her feelings on everything that went on, it feels like she wanted to tell people about her big life changes on her own terms without corporations capitalizing on her big life milestones. 

Personally, I think Tsubasa just wanted to announce it as a blog post, have a private wedding, and just keep on the DL. I think she was also worried about her modeling career being over given that gyaru mama wasn't necessarily thing until a little later. Matter of fact, I'm pretty sure Tsubasa kind of sparked the idea of Gyaru Mama being popularized. I'm not saying it didn't exist beforehand but I don't think it was seen as "cool" until a few models hit that age where they were also getting married, having kids, but not wanting to give up their lifestyle or their modeling career. Tsubasa kind of was the ambassador for showing that gyaru could maintain their lifestyle. You could maintain that career, be gyaru, and still cater to your family. 

I'm sure it was/is an exhausting juggle-especially considering how traditionalist Japan is when it comes to marriage, gender, and family dynamics. 

Tsubasa launched so many successful collaborations and her own makeup branding post-marriage and baby. She proved that "settling down" didn't necessarily mean giving up everything and becoming irrelevant. I think that's super inspiring and important. 

I know the argument could be now, "Well, she isn't even gyaru anymore."

True. Honestly, I noticed that her style drastically changed after her divorce. She went softer and softer with her look until she contributed to "larme" fashion communities. Her look now I feel like caters to her current boyfriend, Fukase of Seikai no Owari. They had matching pink hair for awhile. A while back I recently watched a movie that Fukase was featured in called, "Character". It's a wild movie and I super recommend it. It not only has Fukase in it but Oguri Shun who is a super famous actor. He used to be a dreamboat back in the day but so much time has passed that I'm like, "damn son. you're an uncle now huh?" haha.. Sometimes I forget how old *I* am at times.. I'm not a cute 20-something anymore myself....OTL

 Fukase plays a psychotic serial killer in it. However, what I noticed is that his hair was as pink as Tsubasa's! They had matching pink hair for a while back in 2020/2021 I think! 

My theory on why Tsubasa may have left gyaru fashion may be a reason that even many gaijin gyaru go through... I think her divorce and just all the chaos that surrounded her life as a gyaru left bad memories maybe, Yes she was extremely successful, but at what price? She lives a bit more peacefully now a days and I'm always seeing her surrounded by people who seemingly look like good friends. Tsubasa recently got injured eating shit on some stairs, and she had a friend from LA tend to her for a bit because she was stuck in the United States and was crippled for a hot minute. She couldn't get back on a plane and her friends had no problem taking care of her/translating/ect. So I think (and hope) she's surrounded by good people. 

I think she eventually did find good people even in the gyaru scene. I also have her Tsubasa blog book and she is similarly surrounded by friends and mentions how some models became her friends. There's a few pictures of her, Yui Kanno, and Jun Kumori together. I assume that they're still friends. I think Tsubasa just grew out of the gyaru lifestyle as she aged. She associated her past branding/lifestyle with Naoki and her divorce suddenly. So shit just changed.

I remember reading the section when she had mentioned not being interested at all in luxury items and laughing about that because now, she is SUPER into luxury items. She's always clad in Gucci and even attending fashion week to meet Yohji Yamamoto, who is a very very prestigious fashion designer on the luxe end of things. Her tone entirely changed on that matter. Maybe it was for work given that she's working on "TokyoDot" now...I don't know. It's trendy now to flex and she's always been big on following the trends. -shrugs- 

She mentioned that in her book too. She hated that she wasn't up to date with all of the other models on the trends when she first became a reader model, but personally, I feel like that gave her character. That's super relatable to me given that I also was the girl who was behind on shit and bought previous things on discount because it wasn't "cool" anymore as a kid. Honestly, it gives you character. I was able to establish my own sense of style that was and have far more appreciation for the pieces I had because I didn't treat them as disposable. I think Tsubasa was the same way at her peak. Her style was really distinct to her and a lot of people tried to copy it later on.

Definetely not comparing myself to a queen like Tsubasa, but I'm just saying that it was relatable because I too, gained my own sense of style given that I financially wasn't capable of trend-hopping like anymore else. Pieces became more personal. 

There's a lot of shit that is relatable in that book. The amount of bullying that some "successful" gyaru go through is insane. Anyone with a moderately good social media following in the gyaru sphere of things really does get thrown under a microscope to where people feel like they are entitled to every aspect of their lives. Who they're friends with, who they're not friends with, what their insights are, how much brand they own, how little they own...etc. etc. It's insane. 

That's probably a different fucking vent for another time when it comes to that shit and gyaru...but I was kind of shocked that Tsubasa also endured being bullied. I've heard of other models similarly getting harassed before, so I don't know why the hell I was so shocked, but I guess I just thought Tsubasa was too much of an icon to be in all that. Too many people praised and looked up to her from what I knew but her book expressed a different and more vulnerable side that I related to. 

I'm currently still translating and editing the style advice pages. I just took a hiatus and am kinda still given that I'm still mentally recovering from the events that went on in my life these past few months... However, give me some time. I haven't given up on it!