Procrastination, Cute Outfits, Health Issues, and of course: YouTube

 Hello Hello! Welcome to this month's blog post. 

I have been SO busy since we last spoke guys. I'm basically procrastinating on some of my school work because finishing a project took it the fuck out of me. I've never been as mentally drained as I have been this school year. I swear. I'm not sure if it's senioritis or just the lack of boundaries and separation between school work from home and keeping my home space separated from it all. The amount of work professors have assigned this school year is fucking insane. I think I've also been under a lot of pressure because in order to get my TESOL certificate, I'm not allowed to make anything less than a B. I can't even make a B- so I'm over here kind of stressed the fuck out because of the pressure. haha... 

There was one night where I was supposed to go to bed early or work on shit and I just ended up talking to Calypso for most of the fucking morning. It was ass o'clock my time. smh. It was fun but arghhh why do I do this to myself? Btw, she started a blog so go follow her: https://kestionizonline.blogspot.com/

If you like extra-long blogs kinda like mine she just recently did one. She lives that gal mama life with her family in Paris.

ANYWAY, I think I'm also just over this era of my life and want to move forward and start making a regular stable paycheck. I know it will be a little stressful because I'm a fresh graduate with some fresh loans to pay off, but I know I work super hard and that this all will eventually pay off and lead to me living the life that I've dreamed of living for a very long time. 

I'm either moving to Tokyo or moving into San Francisco if I stay in the US. That is the goal. 

Anyway, I guess I should update ya'll on things on here even though most of you guys know what's been up via the Instagram. 

A few weeks ago I FINALLY was able to do a look. I actually stayed up all night knowing that if I slept and tried to do a look, I wouldn't get outfit pictures and it was super essential for me to have the cord pictures in good lighting considering that I was promoting some stuff from Mayu's brand SweetHeartYun! 

Mayu's Blog: https://mayuminnielove.blogspot.com/

Mayu's shop: https://www.etsy.com/no-en/shop/SweetHeartYun

I bought some of the really cute bear items because it reminded me of old school Tralala as well as this deco bling shop that used to exist in Shibuya 109 way back in the day (to be fair, there were two shops. A whole big bling and deco shop full of different items and then a brand that I think was only sold at SBY and then the girl who designed the stuff ended up functioning independently for a bit. But her stuff was more hime). 

Bears are also super trendy in more modern items though, they are usually included in the menhera/darker aesthetics from brands like Ank Rogue or Travas Tokyo. This is definitely the more himekaji gyaru version of that trend but in a modern way I suppose?

I tried a lot of different things because lately I've been inspired by literal himekaji. I mean..like..not even the boho LL shit but the actual hime shit from Diamante and Liz Lisa but made casual if that makes any sense? Basically 2007 bullshit. I typically don't stick to one substyle, era, or model but I personally think it leaves me open to experiment with a lot of things and have fun.

I definitely had fun with this look. It was wild, I think this is the one time I haven't filmed my make-up for a tutorial and this was the make-up everyone was requesting a tutorial of. God. Dammit. 

To be fair, I was tired AF. I didn't want to bust out my three ring lights and set up a tripod for the DSLR (it's a fucking hassle, I swear) and I also didn't realize my make-up would turn out THAT nice. Jesus Christ. My lashes were doing really well that day and that doesn't always happen. Pink eye make-up/pink make-up is typically one my default color schemes and is the one I think I'm most known for other than me doing red eye make. Basically, ya girl lives for her warm tones. However, I think in the future I wanna try working with orange and gold tones for some himekaji stuff but watch me default to pink because I recently bought fucktons of pink clothing items. 

I recently bought some Popteens from 2007 and the covers have Tsubasa Masuwaka on them looking like an all-out queen. I noticed that she was doing the good old 2000s trick of throwing crystals under the eye makeup/under the lower lash line so I tried it out for this SweetHeartYun look since I wanted it to look extra special. I recently bought some super shiny flatback crystals for nails and I might have to buy more because I really love this effect for the eye make-up. It made the area super shiny and I feel like adding fun bits made me almost look younger somehow?

For hair, I kind of wanted to pull an Okarie. I typically combine different trademarks from different models and combine them or just do my own thing. I know a lot of people like entirely copying models but I've been doing this stuff for so long that I feel like I can divert a little bit and do/make my own thing at this point. I did a low twin-tail style for the hair and because my bands are pretty long right now, I decided to add pull the bangs back and pin them. I teased the front a little bit before I pinned it and I really liked the look a lot. 

The Okarie trademark honestly came in when I added the flowers. I know this is just a typical Popteen type of deal but it reminds me of a specific Popteen cover with Okarie on it (the one where she graduates from the magazine actually) is why I say that. 

For my outfit, I tried to really make it all out Popteen style. The top is of course, SweetHeartYun. The skirt is from Liz Lisa. The shoes are 2006 Jesus Diamante pink and white lace enamel mules with a clear plastic heel. The bag is an old school polkadot Samantha Vega chain clutch in pink and white that has rhinestone detailing in the quilting. I added the SweetHeartYun bling bear keychain in pink to further cuten up the bag. 

The flowers are just offbrand hair flowers all layered together. My earrings (that you sadly can't see) are pink rhinestone hearts. I also added to the sleeves of the shirt for an extra cute touch, pink hair hair bow clips. That little detail is hardly noticed in pictures but I was actually able to make a very quick coffee run and the barista complimented that small little detail and thought that it came with the shirt like that! haha. It's a really neat little trick I learned from when I used to customize offbrand clothes back in the day. 

In all, I'm pretty proud of the outfit. It was super comfortable minus my shoes because I swear I have a thyroid issue or excessive fluid in my legs because everything is swollen and it makes shoes hard to fit on my feet. :( This is another reason I can't wait to graduate and get a stable job so I can afford health insurance to figure out wtf is wrong with me!! 

Let's actually talk about my weight gain for a minute. So for a good couple of years, I've gained weight in a way that doesn't make any sort of sense to me. I don't eat fast food (period. like. none of it. maybe In and Out once every six months or Starbucks once every 2-3 months). I've cut soda entirely and am on coffee, tea, and mainly sparkling water. I do a lot of matcha recently unsweetened because it's a good antioxidant. My snacks have been konjac jelly drinks and nori if I crave chips because it is low in calorie. I do a really small breakfast of yogurt/vegetables/ect. and one meal a day of my choice. I try to stay under 1,200 calories. Weekends I allow myself to cheat where I'm allowed to have my other snacks like chips or whatever because you can't just quit cold turkey or you go insane.

I often cook my own meals (I gotta film how I do kitsune udon and all). I also limit my milk and meat. I mostly do nut based milks (almond and cashew) and cook with regular milk since nut milk can't go in pastas or whatever. 

I've also been doing this thing where I go in between water pills and apple cider vinegar pills. The water pills do really somewhat help with my water retention in my legs but I've noticed as I've gotten older, my legs will ache at night or my heels will feel stabbed. Apple cider I don't know if that's working to really curb anything but I heard it might help. 

If anything all of these habits have only maintained my current weight and I haven't gained at the least in the past year but I haven't lost. I'm thinking of trying to run if my legs can handle it. A lot of my weight gain is in hormonal areas too so I'm wondering if birth control could fix this shit or if this is a larger issue. I've been experimenting around for a year cutting bad habits and all in order to see if it can solve anything but so far, nothing drastic has solved it. 

More importantly, I just want to be healthy. Losing weight is important because I love wearing my pretty things but I want to do it in a way that isn't crazy harmful if that makes any sense because I might be blaming myself for something that is beyond my habits and needs actual medicine. I've never had the privilege of being able to just up and go to doctors and afford it (ha! Welcome to the US) so I'm looking forward to able to "fix" myself whenever I have stable income. 

Speaking of health things, I finally am going to be able to get my vaccine for COVID thanks to my friend Ichigo who is going to visit and take me. My family is pretty divided on the vaccine but I know that I need it if I intend to do anything. 

I have a huge to-do list over the summer actually! Once I get properly vaccinated, I want to go to the dentist. I haven't gotten a cleaning in a couple years (no health care) so I have to pay that out of pocket. Then get some fillings done because one of my fillings on one of my front teeth behind it fell out and it's been a MESS because now it's created an obvious cavity in the front and I've just been stalling because it's been COVID. Ugh. 

Afterward, I want to up my eye prescription. This is why I haven't bought any new circle lenses lately and have just been wearing my Princess Mimis. There's no point of getting them when my pointage is going to change soon. So after I figure all of that out, I want to buy a couple of different lenses. Mainly just a refill of the Mimis (probably in sesame gray and apple green) and my OG Geo Nudies because those are comfortable AF. I kind of want some purple and pink Vassen lenses but shipping is gross lately so if I can just get my main holy grail lenses I'll be fine.  

The last thing I need to do is go to the post office and get my passport. I've never traveled overseas before so I've never had one. But I'm intending on working in Japan once this pandemic settles down (hopefully by the time I graduate in December) so I obviously need a passport in order to do that. Once I figure out wtf I'm doing I probably need to do embassy stuff and fuck tons of paperwork in order to yeet myself across the ocean but the passport is obviously my first step in doing so. I also wanna save up for a new phone because mine is fucking dying gdi. </3 I use it for pics and blog/vlog stuff now too so getting an update would be nice. I'm waiting for the iPhone 13 to come out because yes, I am an Apple girl. Especially since I live down the street from Silicon Valley/where Apple's headquarters is, I like to jokingly say I'm supporting a local business. haha.. 

Basically, my summer is setting up some stuff. Adult responsibilities. However, I should be able to sneak in some fun creative things over the summer. I kind of want to learn electric guitar? My baby brother has collected a couple of different guitars and equipment this past year and he no longer uses his old amp or his old ESP. I kind of wanna see if I have the patience to learn. I really like J-Rock stuff and you don't see girls often play stuff. I always think it's super badass when I see girls play. I wanna learn a ton of different stuff. UVERworld to the Gazette man... LOL <3 Or even Ayumi Hamasaki's "Evolution" because that's one of my favorite songs of hers. 

Anyway, one last update I can talk about is my YouTube channel speaking of projects and needing/wanting to do things. I have a ton of different plans for YouTube in the future. I anticipated uploading a video once a month and surprise surprise, somehow I ended up uploading weekly, which is...wild? 

But I'm so shocked because people have enjoyed me doing so and making a ton of different content. I'm so grateful for the subscribers I've gained these past couple of months. I know for some people 300+ subs is not a lot but for me, it's very significant because for years I stayed in the 100s and I've been making content since 2013 and even before that if my very old YouTube account counts. 

I try not to pay attention to numbers but hey, I'm keeping in mind that 300+ people is a panel room at an event or a convention. It means that ya'll listen to what I have to say. Which is stunning. My talking videos always do the best and that's crazy to me considering I film those on my iPhone with a fucking filter on to improve the lighting rather than the DSLR. I use the DSLR for tutorials and shit and even then, my phone is more forgiving on memory for editing space and just..yeah. 

I've recently started a project where I flip through a ton of my old magazines with you guys. Right now, I'm on a Popteen fix. I've been flipping through a December 2005 issue and a May 2007 issue and they've been doing insanely well given how niche gyaru is. It's even started up a conversation on the style and has reminded others that at one point, Popteen was VERY gal and wasn't associated with cutesy himekaji and that even himekaji as ya'll know it-was an entirely different thing in 2007 and in my opinion, looked way more adult. 

In all, it's been fun and a couple of my gal friends from across the world have taken part in the magazine flipthrough trend as well! I actually made a playlist on my YouTube channel featuring all the gyaru magazine flipthroughs that exist. 

Mind you, if you do end up doing one, I am picky. Anything beyond Popteen 2012 doesn't appeal to me and doesn't feel gyaru. So ya'll don't be salty if you do a current Popteen issue and I don't include it because new Popteen just ain't it. I also don't include super new issues of gyaru magazines because they can still be bought and supported. You should support the print magazine industry because it's slowly dying and it's kind of what killed some stuff to start with. 

Anyway, that is it for me. I probably need to go back to working on my fucking school work. Ugh. Ugh. and Ugh. But hey, I'm almost finished and hopefully I can update soon and with some fun stuff in the near future.