Tea Time: The Real Life Confessions and Rants of a J-Fashionista

There are times where when I am faced with normal people and their judgement on my fashion choices (obviously Japanese Fashion inspired most of the time) I feel like Miranda Priestly from the 'Devil Wears Prada'. You know the one scene where they're debating on the colors of belts and Andy kind of chuckles around it thinking they are the same style,color, and silly?  Miranda being the Queen B puts her in her place and I feel exactly like that. Of course I have those moments when people ask why I dress the way I do or knock on it. Where I want to chuckle and say, "You think this has nothing to do with you?"

Not because they're wearing something Japanese fashion inspired but because when they go out clubbing they put their cheap false eyelashes on just as much as I do. They wear their platforms and rave about BB Cream and their colored contacts they got and yet I can't judge the state of their judgement or them questioning my intelligence. The difference is I don't dress the way I do for the occasion or to impress any man. Not saying that everyone does this but the people I've heard it from that are considered 'normal' do it to impress 'their boo' for to go out somewhere crazy. Hell we even know that Lolita Fashion is the furthest thing from any that. Being a gyaru I feel powerful-like a Spice Girl of some sort with my curled hair, glitter, and platforms. I don't need an occasion or a man to dress the way I do. I dress that way because I feel great in it and it's nothing more than that. 

So I suppose the question is; why the judgement? Why the bitchness and put downs from others on how we choose to dress and spend our time? Do you not treat yourself out ever now and then? Do you take yourself to seriously to fix your hair and put some eye shadow and foundation in the morning? You get your hair done at salons. You do your own or get your nails done at some shop. So why can't I on my off time dress the way I do or spend the money I have on brand or my artistry ? Even when I worked when I was forced to conform to a uniform; foundation and eye brows were a must. Eyeliner was on good days when I didn't favor sleep over looking pretty and if not eyeliner? Blush and eye shadow was a must. You pulled your hair back and got on with it because I was there to get the job done as best as I could. Not to look pretty. But here I would buy clothes from out on an hour long break or mac make up and people would question the occasion or say they wish they could do same. Different situations for different people of course; by why the hell not. You're young and thriving. Set your money aside like I did. Have goals. As for the first question;

"What's the occasion?" they'd ask. On my off days I'd dress how I'd like. I'd put on my circle lenses and ruffles and go out or stay at home. There's nothing wrong with that. Nor is it anyone's business what the hell I do quite frankly.

My family have for ages have been the first of accusing me of living a lie or being fake or having things to hide. When really? This was me and always had been me.They were merely out of touch with their daughter.  I enjoyed make-up. I enjoyed fashion. I just didn't enjoy that frumpy jeans and t-shirt with sneakers type of fashion that they liked. Natural had never been me. Plus what girl likes to been seen without her hair and face done? Excuse me but if I have guests I obviously don't want to look like I just rolled out of bed! 

Yes, I'm starting to sound like that girl on 'My Strange Addiction' who took on a persona and supposedly couldn't show who she really was and such-hell no I won't take off my wig. Last I checked I have a wig cap and flat ass wig hair under there. Unless my real hair is ironed and styled. You won't see it.  But going back to that nonsense show-I feel like because of that show too; a lot of people got the wrong impression on what lolita and J-Fashion really was. I've also been told that I want to look like a doll and while yes; doll-like elements are indeed a part of the fashion, by no means do I want to act or be a living doll. I talk in a normal voice. I do everything that normal person would do in a day. I might just wake up a bit earlier knowing that it takes me a bit longer to get ready. But I have nothing to do with that show. 'I'm a Living Doll' was a whole nother round of fuckery all on it's own. I've heard tons of things on what really happened with that show and a lot of us partially know the truth I suppose but all I can say is, "Way to go America for alienating people who are different from the social norm."Don't you have better things to do than pick on individuals for their harmless hobby? Obviously not. 

It IS true, I'm outlandish but I don't see it harming anyone. I feel like looking your best is as important as being unique. Why would I want to look like every girl out on the street? Same boring clothing and make-up trends at least to someone like me. People accuse gyaru of being this way but there are ways to stand out and be unique. Not all gyaru or lolita look the same or wear the exact same outfits. Just like normal people right? So why would people go there? Another excuse that's been thrown at me; guys like girls with natural make-up and hair. Your boyfriend must be embarrassed or possessive next to you because people have to look or check you out in your sexier stuff.

Trust me honey, if that was the case. I'm sure I wouldn't have who I have as a boyfriend. With or without my make-up he loves me. However, he's into the Japanese fashion scene too and understands how important this life style is to me. Plus any guy who would be like, "You can't wear that out!" Is a no go to me. You're my boyfriend not my father. Even so, why would you date a guy that is insecure about his social standing or whether he can keep me as a girlfriend or not? I'm pretty fucking sure Ying feels pretty damn happy to see other people look because he scored me as a girlfriend and hell yes, he's got a crazy ass gyaru chick who dresses sexy. And nobody else can have that because just because I'm confident doesn't make me a slut. As long as you hold yourself in a dignified and respectable manner dressing sexy shouldn't be looked down upon. I don't get why there's so much shaming. Especially towards fellow females. Whatever happened to girl power? 

On another note; being an adult and being wary of surrounding areas, I'm not naive and I do dress according to where we're going and of course, my mood. I don't walk around in lolita fashion unless I am having tea or a photoshoot or even an event going on-and usually that's all in San Francisco. Gyaru? I'm probably a little bit more shameless. Thighs and agejyo wear is solely left for events and San Francisco. Onee-style gyaru is for Sacramento and casual days out in the other parts of the Bay Area. If I feel like a badass? I'll sport shredded stuff, plaid, and leather? If I feel cute? It'll be something with lace and romantic colors. 

It's as simple as that. So what's so wrong about dressing up for yourself? No occasion. No person to impress. Just good old fun and effort. As I said, I have my Spice Girl days where the clothes and make-up I wear make me feel like a powerful woman and the life is my god damn runway. There's no fake or hiding something to that. I am genuine and contrary to popular belief on girls like me; I do my best at everything I try to participate in and take myself pretty seriously. So why the judgement? 

Are people just scared of what's unfamiliar to them? Are they insecure themselves or jealous they can't be brave enough to dress that way or look as pretty? And even then, why do people have to open their mouth. It goes back to for me when someone knocks on it, "You think this has nothing to do with you?" Shorten your business skirt, ad a garter and sexy heels with good gyaru make-up and hair. You'd be an OL Gyaru. Bitch, that floral print you're wearing this season with those flowerly sandals are Liz Lisa style all the way. That printed tight trend and vamp lips? That was a couple years ago in Asia. Same with your browns, nudes, and corals. Not that Japanese fashion hasn't taken inspiration from Western fashion. Hell yes they do. We mooch off of each other but that's the point-why hate when honestly it's the same shit with more effort taken in? 

As ranty as this sounds-I have yet to understand the workings of people outside of my realm. I made this blog to just to show those who have faced this that are v-kei, lolita, gyaru, decora, whatever the fuck you are; you're not alone. I face it. I think everyone does. And every time I do, I have my 'Devil Wears Prada' moment. May one day I be as bitchy as Miranda Priesty-I'll be throwing coats and having people panicking in the presence of me showing up extra early to the office. Because when your eyeliner is on point your life is too!