First and foremost, while 2016 has been shitty for most-I do have to say. Mine started off incredibly strong and then progressed into the shittiness that was 2016. However, a lot of amazing things and opportunities have came my way-and I've also accomplished a lot too. I think that's something worth mentioning.
So instead of complaining or listing all the horrible things that happened in 2016-I'd like to talk about my personal positives.
1. I got my driver's permit.
While this isn't a huge deal for most, it's a huge deal for me. It's a really long complicated long story as to why I don't already have my license at 25. Before you judge, know that circumstances happen. I haven't had the greatest amount of support (in these last couple months or luck especially-which is stressing me out as the day of my driver's test nears) from people and this is actually my third time attempting. The first time, my brother totaled my car right before my literal driving test. I was stuck driving a car I was unfamiliar with and everything that never went wrong during my practices? Went wrong. Basically I got through the test and went to park and hit a fucking curb. The proctor wasn't lenient and automatically failed me. The second time I went for my permit, I didn't get it. Why? Because my eyes were so fucked up that I couldn't pass the vision portion of my test. :/ So I had to wait until I had glasses. Which brings me to this year, where I finally had glasses and barely passed my permit test (because my eyes yet again, are fucked up and I need to up my prescription). I was incredibly proud of myself because of how many tries it took me and how discouraging it felt. Trying again and getting one step closer to my goal is giving me hope that I can do this.
2. I got and fully paid off a car
This probably yet again, sounds SO. PETTY. But trust me it isn't. Not to place my parents on blast, but the biggest mistake they made was having my brother wreck my car and then buying him another car rather than me. That's a complicated story when it comes for their reasoning-but basically I had to come up with the money for a car all over again. This took a couple of semesters and a couple sacrifices to pull off. Thankfully, my car is relatively cheap because it was bought from my stepdad's side of the family. I own an Infinti G20 in white and it's been a very reliable car that I've named Serenity. I paid her off in two/three semesters of carefully placing what extra funds I had to the side along with the cash for a cell phone bill for a couple months in advanced.
3. I got to model again.
Yet again, maybe not a huge deal but I really struggled with this. Like everything-it's a long personal story as to why I was/and still somewhat am so inactive now a days. The whole ordeal really shot my self esteem and confidence-and hindered my trust in people slightly as well. I had stopped shooting and modeling for such a long time due to all those factors. This year, being asked to participate in a fashion walk and being asked to shoot (and people genuinely being interested in doing photoshoots with me) was very flattering and I've been very grateful for the opportunity. I'm really not the type of ideal girl that most photographers shoot. I barely cosplay-if at all...and I don't follow trends fully. My aesthetic is kind of my own-unfortunately for me I kind naturally give off a bitchy intimidating vibe without meaning to. I'm not very cute or trendy. So I'm very honored that people still are interested in my look and still find my concepts/outfits/make-up interesting.
4. I've expanded the shit out of my wardrobe
No, really. My closet has grown so much in 2016. I bought so many things from different brands. I'm a bit of a chameleon. If it's detailed and pretty? I want it. I've not only added to the brands I already own but I also own brands that are dead now or are hard to find. I really went on a hunt to find things and add on. My closet is literally my pride and joy other than my make up collection. Chanel Oberlin understands me right here (tho she's an ignorant bitch LOL)..
5. The Gazette concert in San Francisco
Seeing the Gazette was a huge bucket list item. I literally thought something like this would never happen until the day I finally got to fly over to Tokyo. Instead, the band came to me. It was such an intense and surreal experience. I honestly couldn't believe it was happening. Especially since it was in such a small live hall like the Regency Ballroom. Usually the Gazette play in arenas now from the look of it. It really gave the concert a really intimate vibe and I'm so blessed that I was able to actually attend. I've been listening to their music for eleven years now on and off. The Dogma album had really sold me and really made me feel like they were going back to their roots. Hearing the songs live were so fucking amazing. I've never experienced a band that sound better live than they did in their studio recordings. <3
6. I've reconnected with friends/realized who my true friends were
This has been a concept that has been a couple years in development. Even now, I'm never quite sure with people. I give people the benefit of the doubt. However, I'm a lot bolder to speak on what I will and will not tolerate from people. I'm not concerned with being kind and respectful to those who don't deserve such things. Because of this, I've really had to keep myself in check and really ground myself emotionally in order to really reconnect with deserving people and sort through friends to figure out who was really there for me and who was merely nosy about my personal life and needed some gossip fuel. I'm a lot more cautious. I've learnt a lot. I've thrown away a lot faith at the same time ironically. And I'm so appreciative to the people who have remained in my life who have good intentions or to the people who have truly wanted to get to know the real me/all sides of me without judgement. Thank you so much for sharing such special, fun times with me, thank you for being honest when I deserve the honesty, thank you for having my back, being neutral understandably so, or just being genuine. Thank you for giving me a reason to still try to socialize and go out-because for me-doing such a thing isn't easy!
7. I made my first 4.0 in my college academic career.
Which never even happened in my high school career because math has never failed to fuck me. Thankfully each semester since I started back with school, I've always been on the honor roll. HOWEVER, I've never made a 4.0 before. Spring semester I didn't have a math class to take and thankfully got to take English and a Health class and survived. While reading and writing are my strong points and it was a no brainer-I was still very happy to still have achieved a 4.0 GPA at least once in my academic career in college. :)
8. I've learnt how to make up
Not only has my make up vanity/collection expanded but I've learnt so many things in 2016 about make up. Different techniques and different trends. And I hope it shows in my more recent videos because I've really been working on improving and learning. I love make up. It's a very comforting and creative hobby of mine. It motivates me to get my ass up in the morning and start my day. I'm learning to appreciate it because once I have a regular career/job, getting ready everyday in the morning won't feel as luxurious nor will I have the time for it. Getting to do things every other day (or only when I go out-which is seldom when I have semesters full of online classes only) is much easier than trying to do a full face everyday. I'll probably be very minimalist in the future save for when I do blog or go places on weekends.
9. I bought my first lolita piece in 3 years which also was my first Angelic Pretty piece
Laugh at me all you want. I've fawned over Angelic Pretty once their sweet concept changed a bit. Wonder Queen was my favorite dress but then Crystal Dream Carnival released and hit me in the fucking heart. While I didn't get either dress or Holy Lantern, I DID get Holy Theater. This is my first lolita piece in 3 years. I mainly don't do lolita because I can't ever justify the invest me because I hardly have opportunities to wear such things out. The hobby is expensive. However, I did pass fall/winter semester (that semester was so very tough D:) do I decided to reward myself with it. I found it for such a stupid good price for it to be from a 2016 release. It's going to be a challenge to coord. I might break some lolita rules (mainly because of those flow chiffon sleeves) but I absolutely can't wait to wear it to Fanime. <3
I've done and learned a lot-and I've gotten to do a lot too. Even blog wise I always try to do a post once a month. But in 2016, I really tried to place effort into my YouTube channel. In 2016 alone I uploaded 22 videos of all varying content (tutorials, hauls, vlogs, and a new addition of Let's Plays) versus 2015's 17 videos that only had hauls and tutorials. I've really tried hard to vary up my content-especially towards the end to show that not only am I well rounded but to also show that there's more to my life. I have friends, I have places I go to, and I'm into a variety of things.
So what's the plans for 2016?
First off to get my fucking license. This is so necessary and has been a struggle with current circumstances personally, but I'm so determined. I really want to. I need to.
I also want to improve my YouTube further, expand my wardrobe even more, do well in school this year (pls god I'm in some difficult math classes these next to semesters), and improve just all aspects of my life...
I want to be open to making more friends and doing more fun and cool things. I really want to delve into the world of photography eventually but the Canon Rebel Ti5 I want is 500-600.00 and I need to throw cash at a phone upgrade and get through my math classes first. Maybe in 2018, I'll reward myself with a nice pretty camera once I am completely finished with math classes forever and have passed with flying colors.
Anyway, hopefully I'll have another blog up soon. SacAnime Winter is this weekend and I'm hoping to take pictures and vlog for the YouTube lots, so hopefully that will be something to look forward too. Until then though, here are a couple of new videos from my channel to entertain you while I am away!
Make up tutorial I recently filmed last week! It was very experimental using a lot of really common American trends, but I was very proud of it and it was fun to do!
Additive to my channel recently have been Let's Plays! My fix lately has been playing the Japanese release of Jet Set Radio. I've played the English version thousands of times but I had never played this version before. There are a couple of changes in this version all from the levels, voices, character designs, and even music that didn't make it in the English version of the game!!
Anyways, I'm wishing everyone a very happy new year. May 2017 still be a great year despite a ton of the challenges that are up ahead of us. Let it strengthen us-not break us!! <3
